WARNING:
The following post contains excessive Photoshopping and probably isn't suitable for children. :P
As I've recently been re-playing Pokémon SoulSilver on the
DS (actually on my 3DS because I've only just started to notice how bad the
backlit screen was on the original DS), I've been thinking about all the
previous Pokémon games I've played and noticed this weird trend.
Of course, I started with Generation 1 on the original Game
Boy. I was going away on holiday and I didn't have my own handheld console to
play, so my cousin Mark (who is fucking awesome), lent me his original
Game Boy with a light attachment and Pokémon Blue - AND said I could START MY
OWN SAVE. How epic is that?! Never to this day would I let ANYBODY even PLAY on
my saves, let alone start their own and delete mine!
So, my point, I started with BLUE - which when you say the
two games together, it's "Red and Blue" (which is what I mean by "the secondary title"). I picked the secondary of
the two games. I also picked the fire-type starter Charmander, because fire
types are awesome, Charmander in the anime was awesome and he was just always
my favourite.
Time passes. And I mean it REALLY fucking passes. I didn't
even get my first handheld until the original GBA, then I grabbed a GBASP. I
did however, obtain a GAME BOY PLAYER for my GameCube from 2003, so I always
had that. As I'd missed out as a child, I got a copy of Pokémon SILVER next, to
play on my GB Player.
Again, notice the trend? Pokémon "Gold and Silver"
- again I picked the secondary title and again I picked the fire-type starter,
in this case Cyndaquil.
Following this, I grabbed a copy of Pokémon SAPPHIRE and
picked Torchic. Also, as I was now able to choose a gender, I obviously chose a
girl. The trend continues, as you can see...
Now this is where shit gets interesting - at this point in
time, my best friends and I all had GBAs and we all picked up copies of FireRed
and LeafGreen. Well, THEY picked FireRed. I picked LeafGreen. "FireRed and
LeafGreen" - and again I picked Charmander and the female character.
Onto around 2007, I was at secondary school and I was in
with a major crowd of geeks - we all had DSs and practically all of us (me
included) picked up a copy of Diamond or Pearl on LAUNCH DAY in the UK. (From
ASDA, by the way, who still to this day do some amazing launch day prices -
except pissing Luigi's Mansion 2, which they didn't even stock until like 3
weeks after launch!).
Now this is where I broke the trend. I chose DIAMOND. The
primary game. I also chose PIPLUP. The WATER type starter. (I did however keep
a female character). Now this could be down to a number of reasons.
1) Every fucker else chose Chimchar. I could own them all.
2) Chimchar was SHITE. I still don't particularly like Gen 4
Pokémon.
3) Turtwig wasn't brilliant either.
4) Dialga LOOKED way cooler than Palkia.
5) Dialga was STEEL/dragon, Palkia was WATER/Dragon. 'Nuff
said there.
6) When it comes to jewellery, I'd rather have diamonds than
pearls. *
*This statement doesn't ring true with ALL of the other titles, however. I do prefer silver jewellery to gold and sapphires to rubies, but I'd rather wear red shirts than blue ones and also wear "fire" red over "leaf" green.
I returned to the trend with the release of HEARTGOLD and
SOULSILVER. The greatest remakes of any video game in history. The only thing
that could steal that title would be a remake of Final Fantasy VII. (Yes, the
remake of Pokémon Gold/Silver is better than LOZ: Ocarina Of Time 3D! Suck on
THAT!)
Anyway. SoulSilver, secondary title. Cyndaquil, fire
starter. Female character.
I REFUSE to play ANY Pokémon game released after 2011.
Generation 5 can suck my cock. And Generation 6 can rot in a hole and die while
being raped by the fully evolved forms of all previous generations' starters.
And as for X and Y... It would be X - because as
a female, I have no Y chromosomes and being a big raving lesbian, I hate men
and thus wish to have no connection to any Y chromosomes. Ha, eat my fucking
wacky as shit reasoning. :D
